Husband of one wife

This subject gets kinda heated between me and my circle of friends. I plan to tackle the subject of what this phrase really means in this blog. Understand that whatever you believe on this matter is NOT salvific. There are many ways to view this phrase so lets start by looking at several different translations of 1st Timothy 3:2.

(King James Version)
2A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;

(New Living Translation)
2 So an elder must be a man whose life is above reproach. He must be faithful to his wife.[a] He must exercise self-control, live wisely, and have a good reputation. He must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must be able to teach.

(Young's Literal Translation)
2it behoveth, therefore, the overseer to be blameless, of one wife a husband, vigilant, sober, decent, a friend of strangers, apt to teach,

(Contemporary English Version)
2That's why officials must have a good reputation and be faithful in marriage. [a] They must be self-controlled, sensible, well-behaved, friendly to strangers, and able to teach.


ok, so now we have that out of the way we all agree there are several ways to interpret the verse. I myself attend a church that believes that if a man has been divorced or married a woman who has been divorced that they are no longer qualified, period. I myself do not hold to this belief so you can see why I have chosen to investigate this and put it out there for you do decide for yourself. Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. Use discernment and prayer to come to YOUR conclusion... not mine.
SO lets look at some of the meanings that have been pulled out of this verse.

1. Polygamy.
At first glance Paul seems to be denouncing polygamy for a pastor. Makes sense, one wife is enough work as it is. How can a man be about God's work when he has responsibilities of that magnitude at home? But there are some problems with this. Polygamy was not a problem for the Jews at Ephesus this time. Besides the Bible denounces polygamy.
Leviticus 18:18
Neither shalt thou take a wife to her sister, to vex her, to uncover her nakedness, beside the other in her life time.
Deuteronomy 17:17
Neither shall he multiply wives to himself, that his heart turn not away: neither shall he greatly multiply to himself silver and gold.
Matthew 19:5
And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

2. Divorced = not qualified
This seems to be the most believed interpretation across orthodox Christians. The problem with humans, and yes I am one, is that our upbringing defines who we are. This is not always a negative thing but can ingrain negative or incorrect beliefs into us. Racism is a good example. I myself attend a church who believes divorced = not qualified. I although, do not. My first problem with this is that we are under grace and therefore our sins are forgiven. Washed away.... forgotten by God.
Hebrews 10:17
And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more.
So if our sins are forgotten, forgiven and gone, why are they suddenly remembered again? It would be a contradiction to say that your sin does not exist anymore but then it must be remembered to be reviewed as a requirement for a bishop. Jesus himself ok'd divorce under certain circumstances for believers.
Matthew 19:9
"And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."
Even though per Jesus, divorce under this circumstance is not a sin because Jesus would not give the go ahead for us to sin. So what this doctrine is trying to tell me is that even though I have been forgiven by the grace of God through the Lord Jesus Christ for my sins, these supposedly forgotten sins can be used against me in the future. That would be a contradiction and I hope all Christians would agree that God does not contradict himself.
Another issue with this belief is the fact that all the requirements 1st Timothy are present tense. This belief also states that the requirements are current states of a person, except past marital problems. See how it doesn't jive with the rest? Now there are some who make a distinction between whether the divorce occurred prior to salvation or not. This makes sense to me. The people who believe divorce = not qualified period have a problem with the following logic. I can be a baby-raper, genocidal murderer, and an all around bad dude. But if i get saved...I can be a preacher. Now I do agree with that, think of Saul/Paul. But I can be a normal guy who made a mistake prior to salvation and married a whore. and that disqualifies me from the pulpit. So take this down the road of logic with me and this says that I can be a baby-raper/murderer but not a divorcee, even if I was not in my control. Do you see the disconnect here?
AS much as I hate to add this point, I must. The first requirement is to be above reproach. And just like the alcohol issue, if marital status causes issues in the church then you are not above reproach. Unfortunately you will be unqualified, but NOT because of marital status, because of the culture in the church and its traditions. And we all know how traditions can suck the spirit right out of anything.

An elder/deacon/pastor is to be a man that the church and community can look up to as an example of Christ-likeness and godly leadership. If his divorce and/or remarriage situation detracts from this purpose, perhaps he should not serve in the position of elder/deacon/pastor. It is important to remember, though, that just because a man is disqualified from serving as an elder/deacon/pastor, he is still a valuable member of the body of Christ. Every Christian possesses spiritual gifts (1 Corinthians 12:4-7) and is called to participate in edifying other believers with those gifts (1 Corinthians 12:7). A man who is disqualified from the position of elder/deacon/pastor can still teach, preach, serve, pray, worship, and play an important role in the church. Biblical Eldership by Alexander Strauch.

NOTE: No matter what your sin. It can be forgiven. Period. End of story.

In my own church we only have 2 deacons. There are many good Christian men who would do an amazing job but are unqualified to be a deacon. This has potential to hurt a church. God gave us rules to live by. When we add to them it is telling God that His word was not good enough. That is blasphemy. All you have to do is look at what the Pharisees did. There is a reason God said things the way he did. Remember,
Revelation 22:18
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book:

Let me make several things very clear before I close. A Bishop or overseer refers to a pastor. There is a distinction between a pastor and a preacher. Many who believe Divorce = unqualified also add this to preaching. This would prevent someone from preaching the gospel on the streets or to anyone.

preach
  –verb (used with object)
1. to proclaim or make known by sermon (the gospel, good tidings, etc.).
2. to deliver (a sermon).
3. to advocate or inculcate (religious or moral truth, right conduct, etc.) in speech or writing.

So technically.... I am preaching right now!!! uh oh!!!

Matthew 24:14
And this gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in all the world for a witness unto all nations; and then shall the end come.
Mark 16:15
And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.
Luke 24:47
And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.
Acts 10:42
And he commanded us to preach unto the people, and to testify that it is he which was ordained of God to be the Judge of quick and dead.

Also I have been told by respectable men of God that they have seen it before that when a man is not qualified due to divorcement, the church he PASTORS fails. I have seen this as well but I have seen the inverse. 2 examples... I have a friend who announced his call to preach. I knew he was either mistaken or God was really working in him. His lifestyle did not reflect what a preachers should. No one else knew that but they did find out that he had been married before prior to salvation. So they did not allow him to proceed. In this case the divorce = unqualified prevented some potentially bad situations, but for the wrong reason. for the record, this man is a very good friend of mine and I love him. That's why I did not include his name. Another example was a visiting preacher came to my church and preached a bang-up message. The spirit was moving and we were having a great time worshiping the Lord. Everyone wanted a cd of the sermon that day and could not stop singing his praises. But once they found out he had been married before, prior to salvation, suddenly his name was mud. So if his marital status was such a big issue for God, then why would he allow the spirit to move that day? I admit God will do what God wants, but blessing sin is not one of them.

3. Single vs Married
Some believe that the husband of one wife requires a man to be married in order be a Pastor/Deacon. This is soo far off I don't know where to start. Paul was single during his journeys. nuff said. There is nowhere in scripture requiring marriage. There are even discussions of the benefits/struggles of both married & single.

4.Faithful
Ok, now i get to defend what I believe husband of one wife means. For starters this says nothing about divorce or death of a spouse. The phrase in the Greek literally means "one-woman man." This qualification is the first because it is the one most likely to be failed. Men are generally more sexually aggressive than women. This is not about marital status but about moral and sexual purity. The marriage vows are between one woman and one man. It cannot be entered into any other way. You can only be married if you are currently not married. Jesus himself gave parameters for an acceptable divorce due to adultery but I think we can all agree this is not the preferred situation.

So... the bottom line is this. You can be divorced (under Jesus' parameters) and preach. The issue of prior/post salvation divorce is a discussion for another time. The belief in divorce=not qualified is a classic example of misinterpretation originating from ignorance and then passed down through tradition. We all have these things that we believe but we have to ask ourselves why we believe them. If your beliefs and world views are just based on what someone said or what your parents believed then you don't truly hold that belief. You are just following traditions. Welcome challenges to your belief system. It should force you to look into it for yourself. Martin Luther did this and found major errors in what he thought he believed.

Go with God
_-TIEK-_

My testimony

I was saved when I was very young. I guess I was too young to really understand what it all was about. So I grew up in church but when I hit middle school it all went to hell. I was angry at my parents for allowing 2 foster girls to come live with us and they caused alot of trouble. They got away with everything because they "had a bad life." The Bible says not to treat anyone different because of thier dificult past, but anyway.... I got into drugs and alcohol pretty heavy. Durring those days, I honestly wanted to die. Taking drugs was my attempt to seperate myself from all the crap going on in my life. I was defiant to all authority thinking that I had it all figured out. It got so bad that I told myself that something drastic had to change if I was going to live through it. I searched for a long time to find this "out" and finally found it when a Marine Corps recruiter called the house one day. He signed me up to p[lay in the Marine Corps Presidents Own Jazz Band. Later, I found out that they practiced 12 hrs. a day and never got to shoot or blow anything up. So I was left with the choice to fix refrigerators or blow stuff up. HMMM I guess I'll blow stuff up. Sounds cool. I spent my service planting and removing landmines and drinking like a fish. I had kicked the drugs but the Corps has a habit of breeding alcoholics. So I was sucked into the mix still feeling empty. After my marraige fell apart and I got custody of my then 6 month old son, I decided once again that if I was going to survive, I was going to have to make a drastic change. I told God that if he would keep me alive and my boy safe, that I would get back into church. I kept my promise but my transformation was not as immediate as some. I slowly began to open my eyes wider as my band Big Fish fell apart. It was supposed to be a ministry but it turned out to be a sham. I was so sick of other people that I never wanted to play in a band again. I started writing and recording my own stuff for my beneffit only. No plans were made to form a band and tour again. But as we all know, if you wanna hear God laugh, tell him your plans. I brought my brother in to the studio to lay some guitar tracks down and that led to finding a bass player and finally to playing shows again. This time I vowed to do it for God rather than for myself. (This is where almost ALL christian bands go wrong. The focus is upon them instead of God.) We were going pretty good with a new cd out and then at the height of it all I shattered my knee at a show. The doctor said I would be out for 6 months minimum and never walk right again. Now you would think that this would be a crushing blow to me personally, as a single father, and as a frontman for the band. But, I called out to God and acknowledged that my life was his and I accepted his guidance. I had alot of time to think laying in bed in the worst pain I have ever felt. And it all hit me. It doesn't matter what happens in my life, God has controll and He said that He would NEVER put anything on me that I cannot hadle. I thought of Job and all the crap he went through but the end result of his faithfullness was amazing! God used my broken body to open my eyes and allow me to bless others through Him. Durring my recovery I was blessed to be a part of my church's Bible School. I shot, edited, and produced a video for the church and the kids. 14 kids got saved that week. I remember the pastor calling me as I washome working on the video to tell me about the kids getting saved and I about shouted my self out of my chair! I was editing a part in the video where the very same kids were together when he called. That friday, my band Seraphim played at Crossroads with Old Man Is Dead and another kid got saved! 15 in one week that God allowed me to be a part of. I was on cloud 9. Now the band has gone through some lineup changes and it is evident that these occurances were put into motion by God. Reading my Bible and fasting has put me into a state now where it seems that my faith could not get any stronger. But I have thought that before and He has put me on the next level up several times.

I was stunned when my little boy at age 3 aked me how to pray. I had tears streaming down my face as I told him to just talk to God like he would talk to Daddy. So he proceeded to tell God about his games and his toys. It touched my heart so much that I could not sleep. Don't you think God listened just as intently to his trivial prayer as he would to our "adult" prayers? To this day, Tyler asks me to read him his Bible before bed instead of Dr. Seuse or Poo Bear.

I find myself blessed more than I ever thought possible. I am constantly amazed at the things God does in my life and the lives of people around me. This is better than and pot, acid, or liquor that I have ever had. If you have any questions about how you can feel as free as I do, PLEASE contact me and I will help you change you life through my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Besides, if you are right and there is no God, then when you die, you don't loose anything. But if I'm right, and you die and go to Hell, you have lost EVERYTHING.

Go with God
_-TIEK-_

WARNING: The following blog contains what society generally considers profanity. Its inclusion was necessary to explore the issue. NO profanity was included in this blog for any purposes other than to let the reader know what I was talking about. If you are offended by profanity, than maybe you should read this. I myself do not cuss, but felt lead to study the issue. Also, the following is extremely abridged to prevent rambling displays of worthless knowledge

Exodus 20:7 7Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.I kinda see taking His name in vain as becoming sons of God ingenuinly

Leviticus 19:1212And ye shall not swear by my name falsely, neither shalt thou profane the name of thy God: I am the LORD.

Revelation 13 1And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy.

Revelation 13:5 5And there was given unto him a mouth speaking great things and blasphemies; and power was given unto him to continue forty and two months.

Proverbs 18:19A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.

Psalm 119:165Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.

Romans 14:13 (King James Version)13Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumblingblock or an occasion to fall in his brother's way.

So...... A little History

FUCK- The mack daddy dirty word
Possibly from the German ficken (to fuck, in dialects: to rub, to scratch, and historically to strike). The origin seems to be a mystery as far as I can tell but usually was used to refer to sexuality. Arguably, it is one of the most versatile words in English with possible uses in every English form available. We have all heard the "Fornication under concent of the king," & " For unlawfull carnal knowledge." It seems that these as origins of the word are old wives tales and just as silly as AC/DC meaning "after Christ Devil comes" and Kiss "Kids in Satan Service" . So why is it profane? I guess it depends on it's usage. Obviously it would be vulgar to tell someone to perform sexual acts on oneself (go f*ck youslef ect.) The only possible non-profane usage would be in referring to sexual intercourse with a spouse, but even then, referring to the German, it kinda has a violent connotation.

Shit is a vernacular word in modern english denoting the feces, the solid byproduct of digestion. It is an old and native English word, but following the Norman Conquest, Norman, Anglo-Norman, French, and Latin terms for many common objects and bodily functions began to be seen as more distinguished than native words, and thereafter feces became the accepted English noun, to defecate became the accepted English verb, and shit was no longer used in polite company. [reference.com]

So would it not be vulgar to have a conversation about defecation with anyone except your doctor? Interestingly: the accepted medical term, turd, is commonly used as a vulgarism. [reference.com]

Damn
1. To pronounce an adverse judgment upon. 2. To bring about the failure of; ruin.3. To condemn as harmful, illegal, or immoral: a cleric who damned gambling and strong drink. 4. To condemn to everlasting punishment or a similar fate; doom.5. To swear at.

Well, I think we can agree that none of that is very nice. I have heard the argument that as long as it is in the Bible then it must be ok. However, we as humans do not have the power to condemn anyone or anything to Hell. That leaves damn being used to condemn an unfavorable situation. What?!?!?! So your gonna send a situation to Hell? As I am seeing, most of the vulgar uses of words are asinine and obfuscated.

Bitch
A female canine animal, especially a dog. Offensive. a. A woman considered to be spiteful or overbearing.b. A lewd woman.c. A man considered to be weak or contemptible. Slang. A complaint. Slang. Something very unpleasant or difficultI myself have a bitch at home. But usage other than that holds a negative connotation, as do the other expletives.

PISS
Piss is actually in the Bible several times and it seems to mean what we use it for today.

2 Kings 18:27But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?

and again in

Isaiah 36:12.1 Kings 14:10Therefore, behold, I will bring evil upon the house of Jeroboam, and will cut off from Jeroboam him that pisseth against the wall, and him that is shut up and left in Israel, and will take away the remnant of the house of Jeroboam, as a man taketh away dung, till it be all gone.

This appearance in 1 Kings was a little perplexing but I think I can explain. "pisseth against the wall" means a man. Kinda like bitch and bastard have gender attached, this phrase is derogatory to a man.

So, a couple of thoughts...
Why is God bleeped out of godd*mn instead of damn? None of my research has given me any answers to who said that X was a bad word and why. English is peppered with synonyms that reflect different levels of each word. But then again, who decided that? If fuck means the same thing as screw and others....then why is fuck singled out as the big mack-daddy bad one?So it all comes down to one thing, we as Christians are to be concerned with our witness and its strength. That means that we are to refrain from things that would jeopardize this. And as much as it pains me, unfortunately we are bound by the ridiculous perceptions of the world on what is vulgar and what is not. This also brings me to the conclusion that if God does not distinguish between the big mother words and the little white dirty words then we should not either. As silly as it may sound that means that small words like poop, crap, dang, and freekin are just as vulgar to God's ears as any other when used in a vulgar manner. I am disappointed that I have come to this conclusion. It's kinda like when I did my Biblical research on tattoos. I want more, but have chosen to refrain because of what the Bible says. Even if I am wrong about both of these things, it comes down to missing blessings. So if I'm gonna be wrong I would rather be wrong in the right direction. Rather God tell me that I "didnt have to do all that" than chastise me.
Go with God
_-TIEK-_